Oh, You Better Watch Out…
The lights lay in the snow blinking crimson and ice. Beyond the glare of Christmas cheer, a shadow crouches under the porch. My heart pounds. I clench my hands around Kimberly's ankles.
"Santa?" She wraps her cold fingers around my neck, and nuzzles her nose in my hair.
"No, honey, that's not Santa…" I whisper, taking small steps backward toward the candy cane lined sidewalk. Oval green eyes blink. A flash of sharp white convinces me. "Definitely, not Santa…"
Kimberly breathes into my ear,"Then what is it, Mommy?" She lifts her finger and points.
You Better Not Cry….
The snow bites into my slippers making my toes ache. Slowly, slowly, I creep backwards. "It's…a…well, a…um…” I don't have a clue what it is.
Watching me like a prowling cat, it tilts its head sideways allowing me to take in the full profile of a creature face, triangular ears, and sharp blades of teeth. Before an "Oh my…" escapes my lips, my foot slips. I grab for a giant candy cane, but Kimberly is already tumbling from my shoulders. The candy cane falls to the ground, and so do we.
It springs from the shadows.
You Better Not Shout I’m Telling You Why….
I drape myself over her body, a protective blanket. It does nothing to block the shock of the green fuzzy blur that halts before us.Oscar from sesame street, flies through my mind, but much to my horror and yes, amusement, I see it for what it really is.
Its head pauses above mine. I hear the flare of its nostrils. Its breathes in my hair. The heat of its breath licks my skin. It growls low and harsh, "Naughty or nice…"
I reach behind me, feeling for the candy cane.
It lowers its head and sniffs crying Kimberly.
Finding and wrapping my fingers around the cane, I sling it over my head, a candy cane wielding Christmas Amazon, only to have it caught between the fingers of the Grinch himself.
"Nice…" he spits between clenched teeth. Disappointment consumes his brow. He snaps the cane in half, turns, and flees the icy sidewalk. A fine dust of snow covers his tracks.
I previously posted this as a series of three at Six Sentences last christmas. It's obviously been rewritten & more than six (or 18) sentences now. Thanks for reading.
19 comments:
FIRST! [pounces]
The Grinch! I am happy. I am overjoyed at both the loud music that blared out of my speakers, and the fact that hoy cow Jodi, you're so awesome. Can I have your autograph?
/fangirly
love it. Little details like "The snow bites into my slippers making my toes ache..." make it shine only more...
The Grinch's heart will grow ten times its size this day... after I tear it out with my bare hands! This means war!
Scary! ..."It springs from the shadows"...
The line "Oscar from sesame street, flies through my mind" made me laugh. It made me think of Oscar flying across my computer screen (not that he has done that before...)
Man, that Grinch gets worse every year. This had a great eerie feel though it and I like how you broke it up with the lines from the song. Really added tension.
My favourite line was "The candy cane falls to the ground and so do we."
I knew that bastard was real! Ha fun take.
HAHA - how awesome. What a great story Jodi - as expected! :)
This story is both funny and scary. The tension builds at a nice pace and keeps you enthralled. Nicely done!
Love that poster for Christmas Evil. Did you know that is Fiona Apple's father? No, he is not the one that sexually abused her.
Merry Christmas!
Remind me to always carry a candy cane this holiday season. Very cool story!
Aw, thank you my friends! I haven't participated in FlashFriday for quite awhile, so I'm happy I had this Christmas Grinch to pull up!
John -You ol' ogre, leave the Grinch alone you. Didn't you figure out what he does to those who are on the naughty list?
HopScotch - who are you?!? Yes, that movie poster is probably one of my favs. Never saw the movie though. Not sure I could bring myself too!
Merry Grinchmas all!
I love Christmas horrors almost more than Halloween - the dark and ice, so naturally spooky and this flash takes full advantage of the season.
Well done, Jodi!
Both scary and hilarious at the same time! This is great, Jodi!
Not a wasted word with a moving array of telling imagery and emotional metaphors. Very enjoyable.
So well written and a good xmas tale.
The Grinch. I love that guy. Your story rocked. I loved how you put the Christmas song lines in between the prose.
Kathleen Gilbert
Oh so cool! I loved this story! I'm still trying to imagine the scene, where candy canes are big and used as weapons. I imagined a giant gingerbread house scene with candy canes lining the sidewalk.
I knew that Grinch still had heart problems. I like him better this way!
So well written! Thanks for sharing. And, I am still going to steal that music for my site - it is perfect for what I have planned.
Thanks guys and girls!
I've only just read this, what a fab idea. I can imagine this as a horror movie -- the naughty kids (read teens) are getting picked off one by one, and once they work this out they start behaving -- but are they too late?
Your writing style shows how much practice and hard work you've been putting in. Superb.
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