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"Beware that, when fighting monsters, you yourself do not become a monster... for when you gaze long into the abyss. The abyss gazes also into you." ~ Friedrich W. Nietzsche


Hello!

This site still receives a lotta traffic. Thank you for your continued interest.

I am still currently writing horror/suspense/pulp only in longer form. Visit my alter ego HERE for continued updates and current fiction. And please, you can call me Jodi or whatever you called me before I went all nom de plume.

Thanks for the years of loyal friendship and support.


Tuesday, December 21, 2010

The Jolly Art of Handwriting Interpretation


Xmas bells are ringing in the distance. And the end grows nigh. Not because of the new year, mainly because I'm going to attempt The Fudge recipe again. Someone dear wrote and sent it to me three years ago. I attempt it every year but, darn it, I can't read the handwriting for the life of me. It reads differently every time. Here is how it reads tonight. Enjoy. And if this blows up the planet... I'm sorry, Mom.

Recipe: Fudge
From:----------
Makes: 36 lbs

1 large can of eloped musk
3 chops of liqueur

Bring to a boil and croak,
strenthening until beepings honk. Harken.

Add: 1 cube of beetles
Then pan antlers (gently)

1 lb mice choc.  Let burrs broaden niftly.
2 packages of choc. chirps (chicken?)
6 ox marshmallows ala crème
2 tsp of vanilla

Best until explained. Pet sappy deer.
Add walnuts or pecans if so desired. Pour into 10x14 pan

***

Thanks for all the love and support this year from each and every one of you. We all work together to keep the dream, all of our dreams alive. Be well. Most of all, be happy. With a fierce passion. Merry Christmas! And, of course, a happy New Year.

***

15 comments:

Charles Gramlich said...

Listening to "A Pale Horse Named Death" for about the fourth time this evening. "I ride a metal horse."

Harry said...

I can't imagine where you are going wrong...So uh, what you gonna do with the 72 pounds of fudgey failure from '08 & '09?

Merry Christmas to you and back at you for the love & support! :)

Jodi MacArthur said...

Charles ~Ha! It's addicting! I had a feeling you'd enjoy it. I think a couple people would. Merry Christmas!

Harry! 08 &09 turned out perfect. ;-) What I did was get another recipe and figured out:
eloped musk = evaped Milk
Croak = cloak= cover?
Beetles =butter.
chirps= chips.
ox= oz.
"Pet sappy dear" = still have no idea

This gives me a good laugh every year. And turns out pretty good. ;-) Merry Christmas!

Michael Solender said...

Oh do send a # my way Jodes!

Happy New Year!

Jodi MacArthur said...

Sure thang. Happy New Year, Mike S!

Laurita said...

OK, I tried this. I found the eloped musk gave the fudge a gamey odour, but whatever works. My beepings honked alright, but I had a hard time panning the antlers, gently or otherwise. I couldn't find cubed beetles, so I just tossed in a handful of loose ones.

I can't tell you how it turned out because I absolutely refuse to croak.

Sean Monaghan said...

Doesn't 'pet sappy deer' mean 'let stand for one hour or until firm, slice, then refrigerate'? Though that might work better after 'pour into pan'.

Anonymous said...

Excellent recipe, and really not that far off on the translation/interpretation. One thing I should point out, the “?” after Chicken should be a “!”. It makes all the difference in the world, trust me. I also find that gerbils work better than mice, as their fur is less coarse. There is one other thing you should know about this recipe, but I can’t tell you – you’ll understand why if you re-read the second to last line…

Jodi MacArthur said...

Laurita ~ panning the antlers is tough, and I'm so glad yuo didn't croak or kick the goat. Hugs, girl. Happy New Years!

Sean~ Now what dictoinary did you find that in, Mister. I bet it was on the black market. ;-)

Anonymous ~Nuts! HAHAHAHA. ;-)

EC said...

I will take 3lbs to go, please-

Happy Holidays, Jodi. You are a genuine comrade to so many, and I hope your stocking is fat and jolly. If not, maybe you at least had fun being naughty.

Cheers!

Jodi MacArthur said...

Hee! I crushed peppermint canes and added it to the mix. Tastes good! 3# for you! And thanks Erin. My stocking is full of good things (I hope). And thanks for all yuor support this year. You are a great person and writer. Happy Holidays! <3

Unknown said...

Yum.

Have a great holiday, Jodi!!

Jodi MacArthur said...

You too, Ant!

David Barber said...

Hey Jodi. Made some earlier and re-tiled my bathroom using it for the adhesive! :-)

Have a fantastic Christmas and all the very best for 2011.

Pssst...I nominated your Halloween story as my favourite story of 2010 for Michael Solender's New Years bash. x

Jodi MacArthur said...

Heee, very craetive idea, David. I need to retile my kitchen, perhaps 36lbs of this will do teh job?
Merry Christmas, my friend (and Im so honored!!! Thank yuo!)